Rough week

This past week has been really rough physically and emotionally. I got my first denial from disability and plan on starting on the appeals process on Monday. I got a call from my Dr that asked where I would like to be referred, I think this means she is not sure where to go next. And on top of all of that my blood pressure has been bottoming out all week. That means that today I am sticking to the couch, with some ginger ale and the lifetime movie marathon.
As the weeks go by I am finding it harder and harder to stay positive and to see the light at the end of the tunnel. During these past few months I have caught myself wishing time away but I don't know what I am wishing towards. Food has lost all satisfaction because I know I just going to throw it back up. I am now throwing up before I finish eating in the first place. The only activity I can do outside of the house is going to the store with my aunt and even then I have to use a motorized cart and I throw up into a bowl on my lap the whole time. I just don't know where to turn.
I have a doctors appointment with my cardiac specialist on Thursday next week so I am hoping he has a solution for my blood pressure, I am maxed out on all medications as of right now. The appointment is going to cost a fortune but I really like and respect him and his opinion.
Today is my mental holiday and maybe just what I need to keep me going. So, as of right now I am going to keep my fingers crossed that the cardiac specialist will have some insight, that my Internist will call with my test results from last Monday, and that we hear positive news from the Charity program at the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville.